I appreciate your insights here. The quote I have highlighted makes me think that your father knew you related to him in a certain way, even if he was never able to express this clearly to you. I just get the impression that you and your father understood each other in a profound way, despite this not being clearly stated to each other. To put it another way - you and your father understood each other in a way that could not be expressed in words or actions, in a way that your mother could see but could never join in with, and this is why she was resentful.

I feel similar feelings towards my mother, who is neurodivergent in similar ways to me - but our personalities are conflicting in some important ways, which prevents us from properly bonding. But despite it all, I feel we have some indefinable bond, something we could never properly express towards each other, even though we both know it's there.

I'm finding it difficult to describe, I hope you understand what I'm trying to explain.