I agree, we have care systems in place to support older people in need. This responsibility shouldn't fall on adult children of aged parents, and everyone should be preparing financially, keeping healthy etc for old age - if a person does not prepare adequately, it's unreasonable of them to expect their offspring to take up the slack.

In a perverse way, my crappy childhood has protected me from any future feelings of guilt for not wanting to look after my parents in old age should they need it. I guess if they cared about me properly, or I loved them, or had good relationships with either of them, it would be harder to let go. I've already let go of them many years ago after a lot of therapy. They are just people I know at this point, people who are unable or unwilling to change their attitudes and behaviour.

Silver linings and all that...