Good points but I disagree with the idea that your colleague was wrong to only focus her attention on you when she needed you to do a task. When else should she be focussing on you? Are you saying that we should all try to build deep, non-transactional relationships with every colleague?

Most people go to work to complete tasks and earn money, not to make friends with every colleague they are forced to interact with. I am personally happy to be ignored by my colleagues unless they need something from me, I thought that was the whole point? I mean, work is inherently transactional.